Uncle Lazer

Jeremy Perkins 0:00
This is bucket talk, a monthly podcast taking you across America. Meet the most badass trades, people, industry leaders and personalities. If you're looking to level up in the trades, you're in the right place.

Uncle Lazer 0:13
All right, we're here out in Austin, Texas. Podcast guest this time is Uncle laser. Welcome to Thanks for having me in the middle of this field in silicon Park, dude, thank God they scouted. You know what I'm talking about. Producer Matt, killing it back, yeah, dude. But hey, before we get the show kicked off, we got you something goody box, yeah? All right, dude, Brunt man, they make boots for the American working man, because that's who they are, and that's who they care about. It. Little unboxing, hell yeah. Oh, you got me sunglasses. Thank God. Hell yeah. What are these heat waves? Yeah? Nancy, y'all just pivoting into everything, shirts, boots, yeah, office boots, ain't it? Yeah, it was head to toe. But we started out with our first four boots, the ring, the Marin, the Perkins and the bull. I like that, Marin, I got that one in my studio. Yeah? Oh yeah. That's on the first date. So I don't know if we go, Oh, you're good. You're good, yeah? Hell yeah, dude, we got a little Brunt shirt. It's a little clear, that's our belt. Oh, that's cool, dude. Oh shit, that's killer. Oh yeah, look at that, huh? Not gonna lie, probably gonna crop top that. Probably gonna show little mid rift on that, right there. Hell yeah, boys. And what? These are the new boots, right? Yeah, these are new. What are these called? Vast binder cemented. So we had a welted version, and now we got an even more, oh yeah, comfortable version. Oh yeah, steel toe or no, they do come in composite, they do. Or soft toe. I don't need, I don't need hard toe or steel toe anymore. Yeah, it's a good boot, dude, yeah, hell yeah, brother, thank you for that.

Uncle Lazer 1:32
Got a couple Lone Star beers. I actually think that beer is made New York, which is, it's fucking terrible. If that is true, I don't know that it'd be true, but I think it is. Oh, it's Houston, Texas. Okay. Cool, cool. But yeah, I mean decent beer, huh? Yeah, decent beer. Lone Star state, amen. There you go. You're a shiner box drinker. Yeah, that's a winter beer. It's hard to drink them on the river when it's like 100 degrees outside and drinking this dark ass scout. But yeah, no, it's a great beer. All right, so reason why we had you on the podcast? Obviously, you're in comedy, and you're a well known personality on Instagram, yeah, social media. But a lot of people don't know where you got your start and how it came about, but you're in the oil fields of Texas, right? Yeah, yeah. I got an I got I went to college for like, a semester, and I realized real quick that I probably wasn't gonna do that. So I went to work in this machine shop. My dad is a machinist for Phoenix Technology Services. And I was just sweeping floors, doing grunt work, you know, over the summer, but they saw I was pretty handy with computers in there. Like, Hey, man, you know, we got some jobs coming up here. We're short handed. We could teach you how to run this surveying tool. Would you want to go out and go to the oil field and to be an MWD? And I was like, Nah. I kind of want to go back to school, get my life together. And they're like, Well, you make 120,000

Uncle Lazer 2:41
your first year. I was like, school. First year. I was like, school, let's go do that. And yeah, I jumped into that. 2010 worked my way up to a lead MWD, and then became a coordinator. And then they were kind of downsizing, because, you know, the oil field is, it's up and down with the price of oil, you know what I'm saying. And so they asked me, Hey, we're getting, we're discontinuing, discontinuing this position. I was a coordinator up in Pennsylvania, in the Utica up there, and they're like, we sent you directional drilling school. So Chesapeake Energy Services, which is no longer around, they had a campus out there in Oklahoma City. I went to directional drilling school for two days, got on my other rig, and then I've just been drilling, drilling holes in the ground ever since. All right, what's a Directional driller? So contrary to popular belief, you don't just shoot the ground like the Clampetts and oil comes out of the ground. That's not how that works. So it's called horizontal drilling. So basically you drill down to a certain depth, the TVD, you know, a true vertical depth. And you know wherever you they want you to be out in that pay zone. And then for the next 1000 to 1200 you know, feet of pipe. You bend the pipe and lay it out 90 degrees, and you drill for two miles, you got to keep it in a 10 foot pay zone. I would steer that well, bore into the pay zone. Wow. Yeah. So it's like, Have you ever, you ever, like, took a hand drill and tried to drill a nail, and you hit something hard, and it kicks you the other way, exactly, because you go to the right when you drill in, it kicks. It's called reactive torque. Essentially the same thing down hole. You're touching rock, and it wants to pull you back this way. And so what you do is you lock in torque from the rotary drive, and it locks you in place. And there's a tool down there that's got, like a binary pulsing, like a mud pulsar from a transducer. It reads it, and it tells you where you're at pointed in the earth. But it lacks so it's like takes 30 Seconds to update. So you could take a kick and get flopped over, and I know it's you have to be able to anticipate shit before it happens. And different rock drills, different that. Like, if you go through siltstone and then into limestone with siltstone softer, so you had all this torque holding it this way. Now you hit this it goes that way. So you just have to battle it. Gets tough. But how long? In school, two weeks, and you learn the Well, I mean, because they just kind of teach you the math. There's a lot of trig. It's basic trig, yeah, you know. So you have to, like, get your yields on your motor, like, over the course of 100 100 feet, you know, 9099, foot of you know, a pipe. You know, stand it'll tell you, okay, if I'm gaining 10 degrees in 100 foot, it means my motor is yielding 10s, meaning I'm going, I'm moving a degree every 10 foot, okay? And you have to base off, because you can't just slide it, you know, 100% because then you come in above the target.

Uncle Lazer 5:00
It, yeah. So sometimes you have to slide then rotate. Slide then rotate. You have to break it up. And you just have to position that so that you comfortably land in that pay zone. So, how does that pipe pen 90 degrees? So you would think, yeah, how does that? That's a big question. So you got to think it's not over the course of, like, you know, 100 yards where you're, like, bent like that, like, it's over the course of, like, 1000 to 1200 feet where, like, you know, if you do it correctively over just little lumps, you know, 10 degrees, degrees on time, yeah, it doesn't create that much drag and torque. And you're able to bend that pipe, that pipe bows, you know. But it's not like it's a hard degree angle, like that. It's over time. You bend down. How long is the section of pipe? Joint of pipes anywhere from 31 to 33 foot. Okay, so you put that up depending on what kind of rig you're on. If you're on a triple or a double, triple or a double, they'll they make up the shit in the mouse hole, right? And they pick up that big, long thing. You go 90 foot, and they pick up another 190. Foot, pick up another one. Now, you remember seeing that that show, what was it? Black Gold, yeah. Is it exactly like it is on the oil fields? It's TV. Man, oh, shit. Would have shut that shit down on that guy. Yeah? Show, they were wearing FRCS or wearing muscle shirts on the rig. Forget them unless they're drilling water wells. There's no way in hell. OSHA would have let a live active well, okay, drill without any kind of FRC or any kind of bullshit, interesting. There's no way in hell. I remember one time, remember when that big Harlem Shake video everybody was doing goofy. There were some boys on a rig. I think it was a Patterson rig. I can't remember, but they like, jumped on the rotary table while the pipes spinning, and they're all doing that like that. They fired that whole entire crew. No way, yeah, pushing them around. It's multi million dollar operations, yeah. And same with land man, that should bug you. That's more of like, you know, the company man side of shit, the guys that make the deals, that was really, I mean, some of the shit they're showing there is accurate, yeah, but it's not really focused on the actual drilling side of thing. It's the handshake deals, the behind the scene, under the table, shit that's more that lucrative. Yeah, there was one. There was one scene in land man, where they, where they had, like, the the gas meters on them, yeah, the H, 2s sensors, yeah. Oh, that has that for real, yeah. And the thing about, you know, high, I think hydrosulfic acid is or hydrosulfic oxide. It's H, 2s I'm not a scientist, but basically, it's odorless, it's colorless, and all you need is, like 10 parts per million, and it can knock you out and kill you. So, like, You got to have them sensors on when they when it starts to technically, and then whenever that is, you gotta go to the monster station and go upwind so that shit is blowing away from you, right? But I've seen it kill. I mean, kill people like it. Takes is and you're gone, and you're not supposed to go back in and help nobody. No, you're supposed to get the outer because all you got to do is breathe in. It knocks you out too. So it's wild man, yeah, interesting. So did you have to do any safety training or anything like that? Oh, yeah. You have to get your, yeah, I forget the name of that boy. It's been so long, it's all OSHA certified. It's Oh certified. But you got to take, like, a yearly course, you know? You gotta sit down and depending on what outfit you work for, depends on what safety measures and classes you have to take, yeah, I'm sure they have, like Nov and Halliburton got way different shit than Conoco. There's different things that they require in house. So how many oil companies have you worked for? Was it just 111?

Jeremy Perkins 7:57
Years? No, no, no.

Uncle Lazer 8:00
Phoenix. Conocop.

Uncle Lazer 8:03
I mean, probably 15.

Uncle Lazer 8:06
I mean, you work for the operator. But then sometimes, you know, you're, I was a third party, right? So I worked for Phoenix technology service. They're the directional company. Then you got, like, Conoco Phillips, who's the actual operational company, who owns the lease, yeah. But what the when the gas kind of, when oil took a shit. A lot of these, a lot of these, Mom and Pop third party companies kind of were going under, so these big oil firms could buy them on pennies on the dollar. So they bought the in house shit and just made them now, now it's Conoco directional instead of Phoenix, but it's all Phoenix motors and tools. So when, when you came back down to Texas, were you working out of Midland? Odessa, yeah. So I started in the eagle for Shell down there, like Carrizo springs, Tilden area, all through South Texas. And when everything kind of hit the fan, I think it was like 16 or 15 when we had that huge drop, what it did is, like they couldn't drill in other parts of the country, like it's real your price per foot in the Permian Basin, you know, West Texas, Midland out there, New Mexico basin. It's the cheapest in the nation. Okay? So a lot of them rigged state drilling. Whenever we went into like, you know, when wool went under $40 a barrel, okay? Because at some point it's not cost effective to even drill for the hole, because you can't, you won't make your money on it. It's got to be over a certain price point. So interesting. And I mean, just just seeing it and researching a little bit. Yeah, to your point, a lot of the smaller companies get bought up. But do hands typically move from company to company? Is it like chasing the buck or whatever? The best way to to get better, well, better benefits. Sometimes it changes scenery. Can do a man good? Sometimes you work at this company. You know, I had a guy. I knew a guy worked at Patterson for like, eight years, tool pusher. They never moved him up. He wanted to be a company man, but company man's for the operation company. Well, he's working for the drilling company. He wants to move up, and they won't let him. So finally, you know, all right, go give me a chance to, you know, further my horizon, I'm just going to quit and go work for someone else, because I can show this on a resume that I was just for this many years. Yeah, and y'all never moved me. So.

Uncle Lazer 10:00
Guys do it for chasing money. Get offered more shit. It's, it's the boom or bust. Like you gotta, you gotta factor in, all right, does this company hedge their oil months in advance? That way we take a sharp decline. We're hedged in at $80 a barrel. That'll keep you working through the downtime. Yeah, a lot of companies do that now, but back in the day, they didn't. So guys would jump chasing that buck, but then that company would only do three jobs, then you don't work for two months. Can't make a living like that. Interesting. Yeah, good life. Or what was the schedule like when I first started? They tried to break you that because I was specialty. Like the guys, they work two weeks on two weeks off. They go home. I'd work like 60 to 70 days, and I go home for 10 days. Okay? And but at the beginning, they try to see like you're not gonna break and just drag up and quit. They want to make sure you be out there for long periods of time, not seeing friends, not seeing family, so that you're not a liability to just quit on a job, you know. So I mean, by the end, when I was when we worked for Conoco Phillips, two weeks on, two weeks off at a set schedule is nice, or 20 a 21 and 14, that was nice. And that's kind of where you picked up this side hobby, which became your career. No, I dated some witch, actually, out here, like a real one, like a real like a blood witch. So what had happened was I've been playing music my whole life. Me and my brother in a band. I play harmonica and shit, and we go out to this bar out here on East six called latch key. It's my buddy's birthday, and I'm with this witch, and we walk in and there's this band playing. And I know when a band is just like weekend warriors playing a couple cover songs, you know, whatever, dude, but this band was bad ass another hour, and I'm still friends with them to the day, but I remember walking and be like, damn, this band, this band's bad ass. And she said, Yeah, I used to lead singer. I used to date the guitar player. And I was like, Well, I hope they get in a car accident when they leave here. I hate them, you know. But I met him at Bull show, and me her split, and I went to go see my other buddy play the following week, and they opened up for him. I hit it off with the lead singer. Well, at the time kill Tony was at the Vulcan, it wasn't at the mothership. The mothership wasn't built yet, yeah. And so they have the kill Tony band. Well, every Monday night after kill Tony The Vulcan, they'd have an after party. All the fans would stay. All the comics would say we'd party at the Vulcan. Well, if netherrah was at backing band. So there was my end. I got to meet Hinchcliffe Tony and like Bobby, like me and him would send, you know, memes and funny shit on the internet. He's like, Dude, you should come do this kill Tony shit. And the first time I did kill Tony, the first time I ever did stand up. Ever No shit. Yeah, no shit. Wow. But prior to that, you kind of got your confidence through, yeah. So in the whole field, just making stupid ass video, just making Tiktok video, or I was making Snapchat and private Facebook and Snapchat. And a boy I play baseball with was like, Yo, send me these. I'm gonna make you a tick tock. The first video I sent him, I'm like, jogging after work on the lease road, and I'm like, yo, when Miley Cyrus said everybody in line for the bathroom trying to do lines in the bathroom, I felt that because, because I do drugs, well, well, I used to, I'm

Uncle Lazer 12:45
quitting because I made a promise with Well, we'll see. We'll see. I mean, it's a it's summer, you know, and it's early, yeah, I will be, I will figure it out. But, yeah, you know, I felt that. Felt that my love you girl. And I just said that I thought it was stupid as sent it to him, took shower, went to bed, got up for work. At 530 in the morning. He'd been blowing me up all night, but I keep my phone on silent. He's I had 18 million views and 50,000 followers like that. No shit. It was just like fishing a bear or Lightning in a Bottle type shit. Can't explain it. Yeah, the rest is history. Now, you were doing that while you were still working in the oil field, yes, and they didn't like that. They didn't like it. That's originally why I had to quit. They were like, if you don't, they started making it where I couldn't film, like, on the rig, for which, okay, we're working, I understand. But then they said I couldn't film or do anything at all on location, like, even on my off time, if I'm in the gym, working out or running, like, we don't want you posting from any of this. And I was like, Y'all, how about that? I'm like, dude. That's when I realized, like, Dude, my grandma used to tell me this when I was little, she's like, baby. I grew up poor and I've gotten money since. She goes. I've lived it all broke and poor. I can do them both. She goes. Only thing that matter in life is your happiness. She goes all money does by a change of misery. If you're not happy and you're not truly passionate what you do, you're wasting your time. And I never understood that more when I had to, because, Dude, I gotta, you gotta realize I'm making like, half a million dollars a year. All right, that ain't, no God, that ain't something. Ain't something to, you know, just, you know, wink at that's a lot of money. I had houses and shit. I had, like, a career, and I got to tell my daddy and my family and everybody who I love, I'm like, Hey, I'm gonna quit this and go be a comic. And my daddy's like, that's

Uncle Lazer 14:16
But look, dude, just because people can't see the end goal can't just because it hasn't been done, don't mean it can't be done. Yeah? You know, say a lot of mothers have a hard time seeing potential and what could be, and it's that belief in yourself that gets you there. So I got to quit of half a million dollar job, and because they're like, Yeah, you can't post anymore. I'm like, fuck y'all. I'm gonna go figure this out. So your your first break was that 18 million view post, but your second break was your minute on kill Tony, yeah. So essentially, you know, this, everything I post would kind of, you know, get 100,000 200,000 views. So everything I was posting was getting seen, but then you start running into community guidelines and and that you can't say fuck, or you can't have sexual in the windows of single mothers. And I'm big on single mothers, god damn it, and just shit like that. And so finally, yeah, I mean that that.

Uncle Lazer 15:00
Kind of helped get the ball rolling, but then the kill Tony shit really set it off. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. What's it like working with those guys? They look like a fun bunch. They are, man, but they're good people. Now, I love what I do now, but there's a huge disconnect from, like, blue collar and the real world and shit like that, you know, like, you see all these motherfuckers on these with these accepted species talking about, you know, whatever about the current political situation we're in. It's like, Dude, you guys are living up in them hills and them big ass mansions where everything's safe. Y'all not out here. Y'all not out here in the Chitlin Circuit. Cutting your teeth. You don't know what it's like to move something heavy in 120 degree weather. You just don't, and you get calloused over a certain type of way. So you see a lot of that shit in this industry, like, that's not real. That's not how the real world works, bud. And I think that's why people taking a liking to me, because I come from a place of where everybody's been a shitty situation that we're just out here because we're trying to provide for our families. Now, the best way to do work is to do something with your buddy that makes it go by faster, you know, yeah, and you're pretty raw. I mean, I've been in job sites, on job sites, I've worked blue collar myself, and I mean, there's no, there's no sensor in anything. It's It's bullshit all the time, and you just say what you mean. And dude, the one thing I had to learn, which took, it takes a little adjusting to, is if someone disrespected me on location, we went on the edge of location and we beat the out of each other. We agreed to disagree and we went back to work. Yeah, that's how you handle things when you're a grown man. Okay, you can't do that in this industry that I'm in now. You can't just hit everybody in the face that you think disrespect. You got to learn to dance with the tiger. You can't cut off every snake in the grass because your knife's going to get dull, because there's a bunch of them. Sometimes you got to learn to lay with the snakes. And that takes a little bit of because it's not real. These some of these guys get on stage and they feel like they can say whatever the they want. They're protected by this bubble of this five foot elevation, because they're but it's like, Dude, you get your ass beat talking like that in the real world. You know what I'm saying. So it's shit like that. Well, I saw, I actually saw a clip. It's kind of timely, from Burt Christner talking about how, I guess he could have sued over the whole National Lampoon's thing. And his agent came, or his manager came down and says, Do you want to sue or do you want to work? And he said, I want to work. And then they, they just kind of powered on four or five years later, correct me if I'm wrong, but the same people that ripped off that that script came back to him and offered him some work. He goes. If I had sued them, they never would have them shut the door. He never works again with him, correct? So you got to pick your spots, is what life's about. Picking your spots to get in, where you fit in, exactly. How's that beard? It sucks. You don't like that beer. What's wrong? What do you drink? I actually drink Coors Light. We could have went with cores. Is fine. No, no, no, no, no. I would have done cores as well. This is fine, Texas, as long as you didn't say like white claw or something. You look like a big white claw. You look like you can put them down. Brother, I mean, I can put them down. I hate them, though. I hate them. No, it's like static TV. I was a big vodka drinker. Yeah, big vodka drinker. Big vodka guy. Oh, yeah, Tito's. Oh, that's Texas. Yeah, Tito's Texas. But, um, all right, so do you think your blue collar mentality helped you get to where you're at now? So, like, you know, obviously, you're waking up, you're, you're grinding all day long, you're pushing through some shit. You're, you know, fighting with co workers if you need to, but putting that shit behind you that give you the kind of tools and mentality you have now, like to, kind of know when to squash the bullshit, but know when to Yeah, you know. And also, when you're young, you're full of piss and vinegar, yeah, and you're ready to drop a fight about, look, I'm not on testosterone anymore. My wife barely gets hard, okay, you know, I, you know, so, like, I'm not get her to the gills anymore. Ready to just beat everybody up? You just learn, like, dude, a job sucks. All right, let's just get through it faster. Beat somebody that somebody wants to be stuck in an elevator with. Yeah, and I feel like, if you take that approach on stage, because all stand up is picking up a chick at a bar, really, you just trying to be smooth. She's got a fat friend that wants to block. She got some boyfriend, ex boyfriend, that wants to stop you. Just got to be smoother than the other side of the pillow. And if you do that, you can navigate these waters. And people look, if it's true to you, people will feel that the only thing about realism that makes it real is it's really you. You know what I'm talking about. So when you do shit like that, people, people can, they can identify and relate to shit. Like, yeah, have you been over in the business yet? Oh, yeah, dude. Oh, I've taken it in the ass of time. Or do it's like, it's like, how you say with the Burt Crusher thing? Like, if he sues right there? Yeah? It's like, you gotta what you can't just make. You can't make the impulse decision off of emotion. Yeah, sometimes you gotta take back Cooler heads prevail. Take a breath. See what that that opportunity lends itself. You know, it's disrespect, but sometimes you just got to take it on the chin and bite your lip. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, you can do more damage in the long run taking that approach than you can just making a stinking in the short term without naming names. Can you elaborate on a certain scenario that you got over? And how'd you persevere through that? Because, like, look, when you first when you first start, right? You know, I first start comedy, I listen. I got the draw. I got the following. People will come out and pay money see it, but I'm a dog shit comic. I'm not good yet, because it's like anything you got to do something, get comfortable with it, make it your own, right? It's how you learn. But, you know, I've got a draw. Now, there's these comics that been in the game 1015, years. They see me as a cash cow. Okay? They're like, Okay, what?

Uncle Lazer 20:00
Can get him these spots, pay him 250 walk away with the 4000 that he should have made at the door. I didn't understand the business at the time because I was a youngin. I was naive to the fact that, oh, 250 they're gonna pay for everything I pay for my flights. Cool. But then I see I'm putting in two 300 people, and I go, I'm only making 250 bucks off of this shit. You know what I'm saying? It's shit like that, but that's all trial and error. You don't learn that till you get calloused by it. So, so how'd you educate yourself? So obviously, you're starting to realize that you don't have that business mindset, and you need to get more fine tuned. You need to work, work on that. Well, sometimes you just get tired of getting Yeah, and you're like, Hey, I'm gonna take control this, because this is my livelihood. Like I had editors that would quit on me, and I need to get a podcast out. Finally, I got so fed up with I'm like, Look, I'm a liability myself, having to rely on other people. I just learned. I was like, I had a homie. It was real good with editing software. I go, give me a two hour Crash Course. I'll take it from here. And I learned to edit out of spite, because I didn't want to rely on anybody. All it is is solving a problem. That's all it is. And if you care about what you do, and you want to be great at it. You take the reins. You take control the range. You drive that ship. Interesting. Interesting. Now, you said something earlier that was pretty interesting, and I kind of wanted to go back to it. You played baseball, yeah, yeah, yeah, travel ball, that shit. But I got just when you're in it, since you're seven to your 18. I mean, yeah, dude, I was five six, 125

Uncle Lazer 21:23
you know, I'm saying, like, I'm not hitting dinger, you know, 500 foot dingers. I'm left handed, so that works. I could pitch a little bit, but I just got burnt out, man. And, you know, looking back, I'm like, you know, now, like, how much I love baseball. I mean, did you play growing up? I did, yeah, like, now I love watching it. I'm like, I think back to, like, damn if I just would have went to these fucking extra hitting clinics and done a bunch of shit. Really could have. Because, I mean, I mean, I was, I was playing on 18 and under teams when I was, like, 1516, I mean, I was good, yeah, you know, but like, I just got burnt out on the ship, yeah. And does that happen a lot down in Texas. You guys play ball all year. Oh, dude, all your travel ball, yeah. Oh, travel ball. It's a money pit. And you just, but you get opportunities. Scouts are there? Yeah, we played in college, yeah, yeah. I mean, dude, it's and then like to think, How much am I? You know, my daddy back then, he wasn't making no goddamn money. He's buying me a bat every year, paying these fees. We're driving halfway across the country. I mean, it's a lot. And give a shout out to, you know, you gotta have a good support system everything in life. You got to have people around that believe in you, yeah, or at least give you the leeway to make the decisions, them, decisions on your own, to up, because only way you learn is trial by fire. That's the only way you learn. Now, did you come from a blue collar household? Was your dad? Well, yeah, my Daddy worked at, you know, he's a machinist. He works old school leaves and mills, yeah, my mama worked at Frito. Lay her breast milk tastes like Cheeto Puff.

Uncle Lazer 22:41
So I bet you had a stash of Fritos when you were growing up, huh? Bro, I was so fat as a kid because we would just eat chip sandwiches, put chips and bread because we didn't have no baloney and just tear that into so it's wild. So your dad, did he work first, second or third shifter? I mean, he, you know, it varied like because, you know, he was at a smaller company to him and his, him and his buddy, you know, worked out in high school. He worked there for about 20 years, you know, just, you know, regular fucking nine to five work a little overtime. Then he started moving up. He got better his shit. Then he was running crews, and he's managed it. Now he's hell, he's getting ready to retire. So when you were, when you were graduating high school, and you said you did some college, I think a lot of the younger generation kind of gets fucked up here, yep. But Did your dad not want you to go into the blue collar world? And once he said, you know, look, it's my job having you to be able to provide you a little bit of guidance, you got to make your own decision. I'm gonna tell you what you can and can't do. I'll give you my insight on the matter at hand. But dude, the thing I don't tell you about school is, if you don't go to school to be a doctor or engineer if you go for a liberals Arts major or a business management degree, Hey, man, do you like debt and only making 36k a year? No one tells you. They just say, hey, go to school. Get a degree. You're set. That's not fucking real, buddy. That's not real because the only thing in life that talks is money, money. And they don't say, Dude, they don't teach you how to do a fucking checkbook. They don't teach you how to do fucking taxes in high school. They keep you dumb on purpose. They keep you I sincerely believe that, like, they don't give you any kind of insight, like any kind of guidance. There's like, Here you go. You graduated. Go figure it out. They don't understand. And I realized real quick. I'm like, yo, if I'll make 120,000

Uncle Lazer 24:13
here, I'm gonna be making more than all my buddies when they finish school. And I'm gonna have four years under this shit under my belt, they're gonna be playing catch up, because all my friends like, Oh, he's rubbed out of college. Real cool, man. You're gonna work at Frito, lay with your mom, you know, shit like that. I'm like, No, man, I'm telling you, because a lot of people don't see the potential in shit, and that's where I thrive see when other people can't. So now you got $120,000

Jeremy Perkins 24:34
a year job, and you're fresh out of high school, right? What are you doing with all money? Brother, I mean, we're out here. You might want to go get it in post. It in

Uncle Lazer 24:44
post, Hey, man, hey, oh, hey, call it oil filled, rich, that dirty old money. Yeah, two weeks on, two weeks off. Now listen, out there, you couldn't drink or do drugs out at the locations dogs and SUVs that come through. So I'd work out every day, follow diet regiment, but them two weeks off. Boy, oh my god.

Uncle Lazer 25:00
God, I'd lucky if I seen a bed to sleep in two days out of them two weeks. So, you know, I'm saying just work hard, party harder. So right now, you on tour. What are you doing? Yeah, yeah. And like, Dude, you know what cool thing about comedy shit is, is, like, it's not like, rock and roll. I mean, it is. You just route shit. So I'll be gone. It's getting to the point now where I don't have to go out every weekend. I'm making enough money doing a one weekend, or, you know, I'll do like a weekend, and I'll do like another weekend, I'll be off, like, I'm on, like, I got here today, I'll be off for two weeks. So it's just, like, kind of picking your spots. You can be a lot more choosy with deals once you start. But, yeah, I mean, but tour is fun, man, that's where you make all your money, yeah, and then you get to see the world, see people, strange women. It's a great time. So obviously, still doing stand up, you know, doing some big stuff. Yep, you got the podcast, podcast, but, but how do you diversify? Right? You know, you can only, you can only push so far in those directions. How do you, how do you keep getting that next level, acting like, what are you doing next? I mean, dude, I'm really good at not saying no to shit, yeah, because you can't make memories while you're sleeping. So if someone's like, hey, you know, because cowboy Donald's running well, he's always partners with y'all. He hits me up. He's like, Hey, man, I'm shooting this Western. I wrote a part in this Western. You think you can come out for a weekend and play this shit? And I'm like, what I got to do? He's like, you know, just be yourself, gritty, Southern, nasty, mean mother from the south. You're confederate officer. I said, Tell me more. Yeah. And like, I get on scene. And like, you know, you know, I'm just gonna dive in. Anything I do, if I don't know how to do it, I'll fake it till I make it. You know, I'm smart enough to just get me to the door, you know, I'll open it. Hesitation, killed the cat, not curiosity. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. And you learn these things. So I just do whatever. I just want to put my goddamn iron in every fire that I can. Yeah, that's all it is. And hopefully one of them sticks, yeah, yeah, no, that's cool. I mean, I again, like you watch some of the comic greats and and they, they naturally move into acting and then become, you know, big name actors, yeah? Jerry Seinfeld, Kevin Hart, yeah, exactly. So I was wondering if that's if you're striving to do that, or if this is kind of where you like to be and gives you that freedom. When I was early in my career, I thought, you know, I want to do this, and this is cool, but I'd really like to get into acting, because on a camera you get multiple takes. Yeah, you can try different shit. It's not just one cut. You're done. Stand up, you know, you got to deliver. You know, that's the one time they see you. But as I started, it's like anything you do, man, if you want to be good at something, you get obsessed with it. And now I'm addicted everything I do in life. I'm writing jokes in my head or using verbiage when I'm talking to people out in the real world. Like, not like telling them a joke, but hey, I'm a I'm saying, you know, I'm gonna say this line this way and see what if it releases, like, elicits a response. Yeah, that. I'm like, okay, that works. You know what I'm saying. You just get obsessed with it. So now I look, dude, I just like performing. So, yeah, I mean, Mac, what do you got? Maybe back to the job site. We can put it back. Yeah,

Uncle Lazer 27:50
some, like, really dangerous shit that's gone on on the job site. Like, it's crazy. I know that industry is like, I've seen a I've seen a lift sub. So lift and sub is the guy, like, it's beveled out at the top so that the top drive can, like you don't have to make it up. It can grab it and it can and that makes up into your pipe that you're pulling up, right? It's a carrier sub, a lift sub, however you want to call it, classify it. I seen one of those bevels because they get worn down by the way the top drive holds them. And if they're not machined properly, they can slip. I watched the lift sub fall, which probably weighs, it ain't, but maybe four foot long, but it's dense steel that probably weighs four or 500 pounds. Okay, it's, I mean, maybe not, maybe 350 you can still kind of pick it up and roll it, but you can't lift it over your head, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And I watched the bevel come undone, or the latch from the elevators. The bevel didn't stick regularly, and it fell out. I watched it fall on a driller. From like me to you, no shit. Hit it right here. Just it didn't die. But it him up real bad. So you see, I mean, look, dude, at the end of the day, you're, you know, and that's the thing, complacency. You get so used to doing shit. Nothing ever happens. But it's that one time when you overlook something a step and that shit happens, and you're like, what the man that could have been me all because we tried a shortcut. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. How many guys were on your team, by the way, when you're out in the field. So the directional trailer, you got a night, a night, dd, a day. DD, you got a night, MWD hand and a day MWD hand. And then you got the two company man, you got a tool pusher. You got a crew of like, five to seven for day crew, five to seven for night crew. And you got mud loggers any given time there's 2030, people on location. What the is a mud logger, dirt diver is what we call them. So while you drill, your drilling fluid pushes up cuttings from the well bore, right that comes up comes across the shakers. You know, you just you're pumping mud constantly down hole well, they check the cuttings that get pushed up back whole because, just because it says, Hey, this should be shell. We should be drilling in shell right here. But we're getting 80% limestone because, like, the earth ain't just flat like this, okay, it runs like, up, down. You ever seen like canyons and shit, like valleys and different limestone.

Uncle Lazer 30:00
Sediments sit different ways. It ain't just flat. So even though you know our azimuth and our inclination, say, hold 91 at you know 352, azimuth. Mean, we're bed damn near, do you know due north? You know, you go and then, like, all of a sudden the drilling will slow down. Like, why is drilling slowing down? We should be in Shell well, that mud loggers take them samples, like we're 90% limestone. So then them engineers and them geologists will base that and be like, All right, we need to dip down, come down here, because it's, you're chasing the shell that, so you're up, down, left, right, getting out of it. Interesting. So there's a lot of science behind it. I mean, it ain't, yeah, it's a lot more. It ain't just, hey, drill, baby, drill. There's a lot of shit that goes into it. Yeah? And you guys have geologists and shit out there that help you out with all Yeah. So you have a main engineer, you have a main engine geologist. They're in the office like you're sending emails constantly, and they're sending reports, they're checking the pace on and Yeah. And they just, kind of you, just kind of you, kind of you, kind of steering blind based off what really sucks is when you have to work nights. You know, these dudes work nine to five, yeah? So if I gotta call a motherfucking engineer at three in the morning, be like, hey man, he's gonna be pissed off already, and I'm calling him, wake him up. I'm like, hey motherfucker, we've been in limestone for the last 900 foot. We're tearing up these bits. We're fucking shit up. We're not in the correct area. I know your little paper says we're in the correct area, but I'm telling you, and the worst thing about that shit is like, Yo, you gotta realize, like, I'm out there for 11 years by year, you know, seven or eight. I know what the fuck I'm doing, all right? And you get these, like, mothers that come out of college with these fucking,

Uncle Lazer 31:31
you know, these goddamn drilling engineer degrees, and they try to rewrite the book. I'm like, Hey, man, sounds good on paper, buddy, that ain't gonna work out here in the real world. I said, let me get Western on this motherfucker. And I'll put it where we need to be. But you can't be trying to implement all this bullshit that sounds good with theory, because theory ain't shit in the real world. Okay, yeah, so tick on your goddamn wasn't a tick. That was a tick on your microphone. That's fantastic. You know, there's a tick that it there's a red tick in Texas that if it bites you, it makes you severely like deathly poisoned to red meat, red meat. Eat red meat. They'll damn near kill you. Yeah, yeah, you might as well just kill me, buddy. Yeah. So we got, we got ticks up north, but nothing. I mean, Lyme disease, that's about it, yeah, dude, and some of the deer down here, especially like candy Lake Wimberly area, you can see them that got it, like half their face is falling off and shit. It's, yeah, it's called Chronic Wasting Disease. Yep, it's from, it's from Lyme. It's a Lyme disease, like, substance, yeah, like, that's in the blood. It's crazy up north, I think, I think I forget what the line is, but like, there's pockets, and down here, Chronic Wasting Disease is, like, actually pretty bad, like, zombie, they call them zombie dude, yeah, but up north, we haven't seen any of that, so that's kind of interesting. But you do much hunting? Oh, yeah, I just killed a fucking Impala up on this goddamn Ranch, not at that zoo down.

Uncle Lazer 32:49
No, like these dudes is actually got the belt buckle on fucking black top ranch. Yeah. They're like, this clothing company. They do shit with bunch of models. They're like, Yo, we love your shit. Come out. We'll let you shoot a deer. Just like, do some pose and some videos with us. And I go, cool. I was like, Can I bring my dad? And so I brought my dad out there. And we got to fucking we're this big ass monster truck just cruising over the valleys. Can looking for antelope, water buffalo. It was all kind of shit. I wound up killing a fucking Impala at night time, chasing it down, shooting it, shot it, hit it in the leg. I thought I hit it because it laid down. I'm like, we should let it bleed out, guys, dude, and we drive into it, gets up, runs off, thought we lost him. Look for him for an hour. Couldn't find no blood. I'm like, I know I hit that because you know, when you hit a fucking animal, you're the you're that. You know when you hit ground and when you hit me, and we couldn't find it. And as we're driving out, we see all them, like, does, the Impala does, and there's three males, and that's what we seen. And that one kind of pivoting, and I just from, like, 20 hours, wow. And as we're cleaning them, we found the bullet in his leg. It was dope. Is it any? Is it cleaning any different than it's a real deal. But we, you know, because, like, them boys do that shit for a living. Like, anytime I try to clean a deer, my dad, like, you're fucking it

Uncle Lazer 33:56
up, you know, so, like, but I wanted to get a shoulder mount, you know what I'm saying. I don't know how to smell it that way. I know how to get the meat off. I can't dress it that way, Cape it. They call it, tape it. That's the word. Look at him, dude. How did Paula meat taste? I ain't got it back in he literally messaged me this morning. Say, your meat almost done and your mouth will be done in two weeks. So how do they suggest you eat it? A lot of smoking or so I'm pretty good. Let that little, that little young boy, River was his name, like, a little, just a little ranch hand out there. He's like, Man, look, dude, my daddy's got this process and thing down the street. He's like, we do bad ass jalapeno sausage. I'll give you some deer steaks. Yep, cut it and like, so I was like, you know, dude, I've never eaten this before, and I can only imagine Apollo's probably gonna be gamey as a mother. Yeah? I was like, just make it worth a nice gamey. Yeah, he's I got you hell yeah. So what do you normally hunt besides white tail, white tail and nutria rat, you know? And been doing it since you were a kid. Oh yeah. We've been spotlighting deer off solid road since I was a since I was can we not say that? Is that illegal? I mean it we've been telephoning catfish in the river. Get that old crank box out. Boy, watch them. White Bear.

Uncle Lazer 35:00
Please come up and float to the top. Whiskers all curl from the electricity current, yeah, dude. Oh no. I've been, I've been, I've been poaching since I was a boy. Oh,

Jeremy Perkins 35:11
wildlife, score. Wildlife manager is gonna love this one, yeah, but it's seven years due processing. It's out of jurisdiction. They can't get me, man, there you go. Yeah, they gotta catch you in the act. Yeah, bow or or rifle. I'll do both. I mean, when I was younger, I like to do the bow hunt, because you get to go out earlier, yeah, season, like a month earlier. But now, dude, we just, I got a little goddamn little lever action 3030 I'll just open iron sites, can old western timing and just get out there. So, yeah, I don't get to hunt as much anymore, just because I'm so busy. So it was cool, dude. Lever action 3030 if it's an older one, they only had, what? Marlin and Winchester Marlins, it's Marlon. Yeah, that's, that was when my son started hunting with but now he's got a 243 so 240 that first thing I learned, 243 little synthetic stock. Yeah, stock and a mother, don't and don't. Kick that back. His is a savage out of, like, whatever best, yeah, outside of that, like, what do you do for fun, besides single women, cane, drinking comedy,

Uncle Lazer 36:06
social media, shit like that. What else you like to do? Sleep? Man. You know what I miss the most when I'm on tour my mother fucking bed. Sleeping in my bed alone is the greatest feeling in the world. Boys spill it over my cup. Fine. No, baby, I just want to go to bed by myself. I'll call you in the morning. I want to go to bed by myself. I mean, how often do you actually get to sleep in your own bed?

Uncle Lazer 36:29
Dude? It's, it's becoming few and far between, to be honest. So it's cool to have, like, but now that, like, you know, you got to put in the work, get established, and now I don't have to go on the road so much. Yeah, some home war and, you know, like, you know, we'll feel like a workout every day, you know, and do shit. But like, the cool thing about being two weeks on two weeks off, like, yeah, you'd party them two weeks, but then you get that break and you go back out to work, you'd be sober, you clean, you get right, feel good. You don't have that luxury anymore. There's not an off switch, because even if I'm not performing that night, there's still networking opportunities. And I can't go out where people are drinking and not drink, you know, so I have to find that fine tuned switch when to be level, and that's just being responsible adult and maturing like you don't have to go out every night and act like it's New Year's Eve. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it took me to about 40 to figure that out. Yeah. But dude, when you get older, dude, hangovers will last for three fucking days, and I'll just be crippled, just crippled in there, and I'm like, I can't afford that because, like, you don't get up and do shit the next day. You feel like shit. You're not, you're not on point. So I'm having a yeah, baby.

Uncle Lazer 37:30
Ah, dude, eat the corn out of your mother's shit, you know, talking about, yep,

Uncle Lazer 37:35
all right, so let's talk, you know, before we wrap this thing up, it's kind of little bit shameless. We need to go to dinner at some point, and we're gonna do barbecue. Who does barbecue the best? Terry Black's, Terry Black's. Or, since you guys are an Asian with you, this just could be even good too. There's this place off of Lamar. It's called Laurel. It's over there by my podcast video. They're an Asian cuisine infused barbecue joint. There's a Michelin star restaurant, and it's not because if you go to Terry Black's right now on a month Friday, yeah, I'll go with y'all, because I need to eat too. Like, dude, if you go to Terry Black's on a Friday, like this South by being in town, yeah, bro, you're gonna wait two hours. You're gonna wait two hours. But yeah, like, you gotta. I could text oh boy, but dude, I'm not like, Dude, my daddy. And then would get deer off the side road. Have been hit by cars, hell yeah. And they bleach the meat, and then they they cook it well done. Till I was about 1819, so I got out of like, my parents house and shit. I thought you could only cook a steak well done. I've been eating ketchup with my steak my entire life, because the meat was you had to make sure the meat was good, but it tastes like a rubber boot, so you had to get that ketchup solvent. It wasn't till I was 19, I go, Oh, you can cook a steak medium rare. That's cool, you know, but, uh, yeah, the barbecue is just barbecue. But that Asian, that Asian infused barbecue, it dude, they got some cool shit. You're like, how does this work? But it does, isn't it usually Korean barbecue, or, yeah, you would, yeah. But it's, this is not, it's like a barbecue, it's a barbecue joint with these people from like, Thailand that, like, infused, like, all the flavors of that shit into that barbecue, their pulled pork sandwich is the best goddamn pork pork sandwich I've ever put in my mouth. Shout out, Laurel. All right. Cheers to things you put in your mouth. I guess. Right. Yeah. So anyway, talk to me about this wedding ring on this finger. Dude. Is that titties or what is? No, no, it's actually pretty funny. So

Jeremy Perkins 39:17
I couldn't wear a ring on the job. Yeah, exactly. So I was married 910, 11, and it's Roman numerals. So it's 910, 11, 1x x x1 and no matter which way you do it, what do they call that? Palindrome, or something like that. It's like race cars, same thing, front and back. Anyway, metronome. What did you say? Palindrome? Damn. I never heard that word in my life. Hell, yeah, dude. We got us a philosophical Aristotle of Brunt over here. Dude. Look at him, dude, yeah. But, dude, I mean, there's a lot of guys who wear the carbon fiber rings, like out there, or rubber or carbon fiber. Yeah? So I learned, I learned this when I was, I was in the Coast Guard, and we worked lines and.

Jeremy Perkins 40:00
If you ever seen the videos of guys getting degloved, yeah, and then it just fucking damn it's always on the safety pictures, too. There was a fucking story, though, and I don't know if it's true or not, but I guess there was a guy that got caught by his wedding ring, and the wedding ring saved his life because it got hung up on a nail or whatever, he would have fallen to his death. And I was like, Holy fuck, but, like, he ended up losing his finger and shit because of it. So, I mean, but I have seen those safety videos of degloving. I'm like, never fucking and now, now I don't even fit my wedding ring. So is what it is. But hey, if they want to fucking find you anywhere, what's your handles? Just uncle. Underscore laser, uncle, I just google me, uncle, laser, it's everywhere. Got the drunk uncle's podcast. Got some shit coming out on Netflix here in the summer. Yeah? Just uncle legs. Just look for me. I'm your friendly neighborhood mullet. Hell yeah. Appreciate you. Hey, man, thanks for having me. Man, thanks for the boots and these sunglasses are money, dude. Yeah, and I'm starting to like these now, once Are you now? Boy, actually like four pound

Uncle Lazer 41:02
names, drink a good Texas bear. You.